My Dad has been in my conscious thoughts, and I remembered this post I had written. So, I am reblogging it, in memory of my Dad, and your Dad too.
I was going to write about my painting of Cullen discolor, but Dads have been on my mind over the last few days.
I know of 4 women whose Dads have died over the last few weeks. It is so sad to lose those special people, men who have had such an impact on their lives. My thoughts are with you.
My Dad died 7 years ago. I find myself missing him more in the quiet moments. I thought that family gatherings would be difficult, but, as they are times of pleasure in each other’s company, I know that Dad’s memory is there with us.
I had one of those quiet moments recently that have made me reflect on memories and remembering and where to look for my Dad. My birthday is usually a family affair. This year though my Mum and other family members are overseas and celebrations are…
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17 replies on “Dads”
Mine is in my thoughts a lot too. He just turned 95, and grows visibly frailer each time I manage to speak to him on Skype or FaceTime. One day, I’ll get that phone call…
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I am impressed that your Dad is able to manage the technology to be able to see you. Aren’t we lucky to have had our parents all this time? My Mum is in her 90s too, and I feel very blessed that she is still in my life. But I know what you mean about fragility, and dreading that phone call….
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He can’t manage it! My sister visits him and brings her iPad and he sees me there and smiles and waves… He has always strenuously resisted technology, so I’m lucky to be able to talk to him at all, since he can’t hear well enough any more to use the phone and won’t use his expensive digital hearing aid!
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Isn’t it great that the technology exists that allows us to keep in touch, even if it depends on your sister to make it possible!
By the way, what is it with men and hearing aids? Of the people I know who need hearing aids, it is the men who usually don’t wear them. The couple of women who need them use them, even though they find them annoying ~ because they prefer to be able to take part in conversations.
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I have a theory… hairy ears!
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So beautifully said. My Dad passed away 4 years ago this month. He lived with us here for 7 years before having to move into a nursing home. We all feel so very blessed to have shared those 7 years with him. We constantly talk about him. I hear his whistle while he would make tea or coffee. Such lovely memories to have. He will always be with us in our hearts!
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That’s a beautiful image of your Dad ~ I can see him pottering around while the kettle boils, putting the tea in the teapot, whistling while he does it! It’s lovely to have time with the people we love. My Mum is 91 and I love to spend time with her. We even travelled together to Japan last year. Thanks for talking to me about your Dad.
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Thanks, Anne, this was a lovely post. I lost my dad when I was 25, all those years ago, and I still think about him most days.
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25 is way too young. But amazing how those thoughts and memories still surface, and how they influence us all through our lives. Warm wishes to you.
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the subject of my Dad, just came up today when my sister (91 yrs old) was talking about his time as a soldier in WW1 overseas, and she is writing his story up – but there pieces missing because of the battalion or is that regiment he was with… Of course, he died in the 1975 so there is no way to ask him, and his eldest son (my brother) died about a decade ago and he had the most memories… I only have patchy memories of that wartime, as it was 100 years ago and I was born in the 1950s….Dad never liked talking about those “times” which is fully to be expected since he came home with a wooden leg, shot in the foot and developed gangrene…
the hard part of having elderly parents who were both dead before I was 25, and having siblings that were either in their teens or older at the time I was born,…means I have little to go on when medical people ask me questions…
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It’s a shame that your sister’s writing will have gaps, but it will still be an important document. The trauma that those young men went through must have been truely awful, and yes, we can understand why he didn’t want to talk about it. It is frustrating though. My grandfather was a mystery man, although not because of war, and we have often joked about finding a diary that will explain all the questions we want answers to. Perhaps everybody should be required to keep a diary!
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Did you make the memory box?
It’s four years since I lost my dad… about a month before your original post.
Every spring, I think about him as I use his electric propagator and dig the garden with the spade he bought me many years ago. A picture of him sits looking down at me as I work and, yes, I think about him every day.
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No, I never did make the memory box……but like you, I find that there are other ways and times to remember Dad. I remember the Brian Patten poem you posted in the comments of my original post. It sums up remembrance so well. Thank you for it.
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It’s something I am grateful to have been been able to learn, this maturing appreciation of loved ones as this life goes on, their influences upon and connections to us that transcend it.
Fortunately, my Dad is still with us, just… he has suffered some ill health and we nearly lost him a few weeks back. On top of ongoing heart iasues & pancreatis, and recent blood infections, he had a small heart attack in ICU while I was holding his hand… very unnerving… but the medical staff were amazihg. I’m still humbled by thinking of the work they do. And my Dad, although he can be a pain in the butt sometimes, has done very well to mostly keep his humour & courage up through it all. I think the older we & they get, the more it’s apparent how we are like them. I know that when he goes, we -his children and grandchildren- are his legacy and we will continue to remember him in ourselves, through each other, and of course his other legacy, his catalog of old-days memories & the stories he has inspired that we will tell -and retell- in his honour- about him.
Thank you for the prompt Anne. I -obviously- needed to process this into words, and up to now hadn’t been able to.
Thinking warm and happy thoughts of you and your Dad ♡
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Oh, I am sorry that your dad is not well, Dale, but it must have been so comforting to him to know that you were there, his lifeline. And I guess that those times help us understand that time with loved ones is precious, and never wasted. But what and amazing legacy your Dad has created. Sending you warm thoughts too. xx
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Lovely post, I miss my Dad too who passed in 2008.
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Dad’s are pretty special people, aren’t they? I am glad that my words had a resonance for you. Warm thoughts to you.
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