What’s happening?

“What’s happening?” is something I have been asking myself over the last month or so.

You may, (or may not !) have noticed that I haven’t been involved in any thing in WordPress World lately. I haven’t posted anything for a while, and I haven’t been visiting blogging friends either. And I have been asking myself why.

It’s not just blogging. It is a while since I have been inspired to do anything creative, and haven’t done much in my Etsy shop ~ certainly not creating and adding drawings to the shop. There has been one exception to my creativity, which I will tell you about at a later date.

So what has been happening? I am not sure that I know.

I could blame the cold weather. My studio is chilly and the lounge room is toasty warm. I moved my painting gear into the lounge but still haven’t settled to paint. In fact the table has added to my sense of annoyance by cluttering up the space. Today I bought a laptop and I am learning that it is easier to write a blog post on it than the iPad ~ and warmer than the big computer in the studio! The weather is not the issue.

I could blame working full time for two weeks, but that’s only an excuse, not a valid reason.

Really it has been all in my head. For some reason I haven’t been doing the things that I love, the things that bring me pleasure. I just haven’t wanted to do them. Maybe I have been having a holiday. I think it is bound up with not being sure where my art is going. Thoughts about Etsy, exhibitions and textiles. And not coming up with any thing clear. I love to create but feel that each piece needs to be a finished work. It is not enough to have the work pile up a drawer, I need it to be sold/given away/exhibited. That attitude makes it difficult to just play.

There are all sorts of things swirling beneath the surface of my consciousness. I am feeling frustrated at the moment, wanting to force out a decision. But I know that that doesn’t work for me. I need to let my mind work away on it, without a lot of conscious thought. Past experience has told me that if I give myself time something will be resolved.

Occasionally thoughts will hit me, thoughts that are obvious and true, but ones I haven’t thought before. For example, as I was mulling things over today I knew that for the next month I just had to play, to relax in my art and just have fun, experiment. No pressure for final results. That also means that I have to be very conscious about making the time for art. Another issue has been how I fritter time away. So fewer distractions and more blocks of time.

So, what’s happening? Who knows, certainly not me! But maybe I will know at some stage. At least I am back home now, back in WordPress World!

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About anne54

Botanic artist
This entry was posted in AnneLawsonArt, Odds and Ends. Bookmark the permalink.

19 Responses to What’s happening?

  1. Magpie Sue says:

    I can so relate! I go through times like this periodically. I hate to make things that won’t eventually have a purpose, thus my Parts Department for future scrappy quilts. It allows me to play with color and prints in individual blocks with the assurance that someday those blocks will be put to good use. I’ve also found it very helpful to write Morning Pages, per Julia Cameron’s recommendation in her book The Artist’s Way. I’m frequently amazed at what comes out on the page; didn’t have a clue it was in my head! It’s also a safe place to put my fears, which then allows me to move something forward (or to get moving at all).

    I’ve had to learn a new computer, new programs (with which I’m not entirely satisfied yet), etc. too recently. We all seem to need time away from the computer and even time away from our art every once in a while. It’s just very unsettling when it happens – or so I find.

    Liked by 1 person

    • anne54 says:

      Thank you Sue for your understanding. I am sure it is something familiar to all creatives. The Parts Department is a fantastic solution to the problem. I suppose the pages I have used for sketchbooks is something similar. I tuck away half finished works and then use them later as sketchbook pages. I must investigate the book you mention.

      I am loving my new laptop, especially as it allows me to do all the things the Big Computer did, but in the warmth and comfort of the lounge room. Have fun with your new computer.

      Like

  2. katechiconi says:

    “If you hear a voice within you say ‘you cannot paint,’ then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.” Vincent Van Gogh
    What you make is not ‘for’ anything, except to express your joy in the beauty of the natural world. The fact that others wish to share that joy by buying your work is not the work’s purpose. We create because we can and because we must.
    You cannot force it, but at the same time, it is by doing it that you will make the joy of it return. It *will* return, but perhaps encourage it by setting yourself very small exercises which do not consume much time, are easily achieved and will get the flow running again?
    You have been missed on WP, so do stay with us!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. anne54 says:

    Kate, your words are very wise. Thank you. You are right ~ we create because we must, and it is a way to express the beauty of the natural world. Maybe I am feeling out of sorts because I haven’t been creating…..i am going to start sketching regularly again; free myself up with some doodling.
    It is very sweet of you to say that I have been missed on WP. I certainly intend to stay!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. acflory says:

    We did notice, and welcome back! I won’t say I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been struggling with your art. “if I give myself time something will be resolved.” As hard and unpleasant as it may be, sometimes you really do just have to wait it out.
    Not sure if this helps but when I write, I do so with the absolute conviction that it’s for /me/. If I end up with something I think others might enjoy as well then I’ll publish. If not….-shrug-….I’m not quite starving in my garret yet.:)
    The world puts enough pressure on us as it is without us adding yet more. -hugs-

    Like

  5. Anne, thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us. I do think the weather can play on our emotions. Winter months have historically been for resting. Shorter days, colder weather and lack of sunlight play a roll. I hope you’re not experiencing a winter depression, and if you are, perhaps a visit to your doctor might help. If I’m reading more into your malaise, it is only from a place of concern. Thinking of you and hoping you find your way.

    Like

  6. cedar51 says:

    I finished my Diploma and was thrilled when I got a definite pass – then I started making a daily kind of Mandala that I have now changed to a Kaleidoscope design. Then I decided that going back to Uni was a great idea, it would give me some breathing space!

    Well, just last week a few days before leaving for the retreat (that I have just returned from) I got into the doldrums over that return – the retreat reinforced the idea that I withdraw from the paper I had organised as I need more time – for something I can’t pinpoint right now…

    Like

    • anne54 says:

      A retreat sounds like a fantastic idea….time to be an artist. I found that experience with my artist in residence in Flinders Island last year. Have you pinpointed the issue with your paper? I hope you have been able to resolve it.

      Like

      • cedar51 says:

        The retreat didn’t quite match my perceived thoughts that it would be…I didn’t like the standard of housekeeping, although the bed was comfy. The other people, didn’t seem to be quite on my wavelength – the weather was dreadful, so no wandering around the grounds…but it was a new experience, one I doubt I will repeat with these people (I did know the majority but I hadn’t thought too much on their actual ideals)

        pinpointed the issue with the paper, spoke with lecturer saying “I might not make every lecture due to other reasons…” and she is agreeable. I promptly said I wouldn’t be back this week as I need to submit art for an emerging art award…

        I went home and by the evening my sore throat was now a raging head cold (I think I picked that up at the local doctors last week, when I had to wait longer than expected in a crowded waiting area, a number of coughing people) – so I emailed lecturer to say I was now trying to sort out the art, plus get over the “cold”

        Her reply, basically, take your time, and get better… (made it all better for sure)

        I finally got my act together and this morning in a fit of hurry (am much better) got my entry submitted by email…

        Like

  7. melaleuca says:

    I often get stuck and find myself easily distracted and try to exert a bit of discipline especially with use of technology. One thing that helps me is to keep a sketchbook just for doodling using aqua pencils and a water brush, another just for colour-mixing or making colour charts. Sometimes though there are seasons simply for gazing, pondering and wandering. And simply being quiet..

    Like

    • anne54 says:

      Isn’t Winter the perfect time for gazing and pondering, a season to look inward. I think I am missing having the time to be quiet and ponder. I am going to carve out some time for myself very soon. Thanks for taking the time to give me some good ideas.

      Like

  8. M. L. Kappa says:

    I think everyone needs the occasional break, even from things we love. Personally, I find if I get stuck with something, it helps to sleep on it – or let it stew by itself for a while. Then you come back refreshed. This goes for writing, art, and even difficult life decisions. X

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Pingback: “My life has been a tapestry….” | Anne Lawson

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